don't allow them to play Mature rated games.

OK, let me get this right. It's OK to ask about childhood advise on these forums but asking about dating, Gf's, hairstyles, etc classifies one as a loser with no life by most, correct?

get married and stay that way, children from broken homes are the worst

[quote="Sgt>Stackem":5ba7c]get married and stay that way, children from broken homes are the worst[/quote:5ba7c]

Bullshit. Children who get what they want all the time are the worst. My parents were divorced ages ago, and i'm fine. I find that rich kids are the worst, but anyways, yeah
Be firm with the child, don't let him/her be in charge, or you will become their bitch.

They can smell fear.....one minute they are a cute little baby, then they are choking you with an extension cord.

always show love for your child and avoid conflict as much as possible....present the child with endless opportunities to explore life and expand the knowledge..

Correct.
We dont care about you, your horny need, your "weave". This kid could be the one who finds the cure for cancer.

Yes but if you date a girl and marry her and then have sex with her you could create the kid that cures cancer happy:

Like W C Fields said "There are no [url=http://www.ianai.net/jokes/GroceryStoreKid.avi:be4b5]tough[/url:be4b5] kids.........Just parboil them for three hours or so and they turn out tender every time."

[quote="Animal Mother":05178]Correct.
We dont care about you, your horny need, your "weave". This kid could be the one who finds the cure for cancer.[/quote:05178] Who the hell said anything about weave, huh? annoy:

kiss your social life, sexlife, gaming life, and any other life you have goodbye. say good bye to sleep as well. you will run on adrenaline the first few weeks then you and the mommy will start to go at each others throat eek: ..advice?

...eat in shifts. assuming you work 40+ hours a week..take the kid as much as you can when you get home and always take the kid on the weekends. if they cry go through a checklist:

-check diaper
-hungry?
-might be hot or cold
-over stimulated in which case you will just have to deal with it
-over tired(see above)

swaddling the kid for the first 3-4 weeks is golden. might wanna pick up "sounds of the womb" and play it when they get cranky. get a swing.

after about 4 weeks have someone you trust babysit and go bang your girl out for 3 hours straight...gl and hf...gg stupid: