Alliedassault

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-   -   You vs. The Kids (alliedassault.us/showthread.php?t=45937)

Chronic Diarrhea 04-23-2005 07:21 PM

Come on, do you guys realise how easy 5 year old kids start crying? Hell most kids I know start flopping all over the place in pain if they bump their head on the coffee table, so a knee/leg/forearm/fist to the face would put them on the ground for a while.

Lets say you have 30 kids circled around you. Start your assault by charging in any direction. Roundhouse kick to begin. That alone will take out about 3 kids. Then just start running into the rest of the kids. Don't worry about punching, since they will be too short to get down to. Just running over them will knock them to the ground. Eventually, all the kids will be on the ground crying. This is when you begin your knockouts. This is achieved by swift blows to the temple. You could possibly kill a few kids in the process, but oh well.

Hawke 04-23-2005 07:39 PM

[quote="Chronic Diarrhea":65a2c]Come on, do you guys realise how easy 5 year old kids start crying? Hell most kids I know start flopping all over the place in pain if they bump their head on the coffee table, so a knee/leg/forearm/fist to the face would put them on the ground for a while.

Lets say you have 30 kids circled around you. Start your assault by charging in any direction. Roundhouse kick to begin. That alone will take out about 3 kids. Then just start running into the rest of the kids. Don't worry about punching, since they will be too short to get down to. Just running over them will knock them to the ground. Eventually, all the kids will be on the ground crying. This is when you begin your knockouts. This is achieved by swift blows to the temple. You could possibly kill a few kids in the process, but oh well.[/quote:65a2c]
Yeah, that's what I was saying. 5 year olds would be easy as hell.

Hawke 04-23-2005 07:45 PM

[quote:ce8fe]...Imagine 30 5 year olds all swarming you at once, biting you in the balls,....[/quote:ce8fe]
rofls

Coleman 04-23-2005 07:51 PM

[quote="Chronic Diarrhea":cc2f7]Come on, do you guys realise how easy 5 year old kids start crying? Hell most kids I know start flopping all over the place in pain if they bump their head on the coffee table, so a knee/leg/forearm/fist to the face would put them on the ground for a while.

Lets say you have 30 kids circled around you. Start your assault by charging in any direction. Roundhouse kick to begin. That alone will take out about 3 kids. Then just start running into the rest of the kids. Don't worry about punching, since they will be too short to get down to. Just running over them will knock them to the ground. Eventually, all the kids will be on the ground crying. This is when you begin your knockouts. This is achieved by swift blows to the temple. You could possibly kill a few kids in the process, but oh well.[/quote:cc2f7]maybe you missed the guide lines:
[quote:cc2f7]- You are in an enclosed area, roughly the size of a basketball court. There are no foreign objects.
- You are not allowed to touch a wall.
- When you are knocked unconscious, you lose. When they are all knocked unconscious, they lose. Once a kid is knocked unconscious, that kid is "out."
- I (or someone else intent on seeing to it you fail) get to choose the kids from a pool that is twice the size of your magic number. The pool will be 50/50 in terms of gender and will have no discernable abnormalities in terms of demographics, other than they are all healthy Americans.
- The kids receive one day of training from hand-to-hand combat experts who will train them specifically to team up to take down one adult. You will receive one hour of "counter-tactics" training.
- There is no protective padding for any combatant other than the standard-issue cup.
* The kids are motivated enough to not get scared, regardless of the bloodshed. Even the very last one will give it his/her best to take you down. [/quote:cc2f7]

pay attention to that last one.

Hawke 04-23-2005 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coleman
[quote:70dd3]- You are in an enclosed area, roughly the size of a basketball court. There are no foreign objects.
- You are not allowed to touch a wall.
- When you are knocked unconscious, you lose. When they are all knocked unconscious, they lose. Once a kid is knocked unconscious, that kid is "out."
- I (or someone else intent on seeing to it you fail) get to choose the kids from a pool that is twice the size of your magic number. The pool will be 50/50 in terms of gender and will have no discernable abnormalities in terms of demographics, other than they are all healthy Americans.
- The kids receive one day of training from hand-to-hand combat experts who will train them specifically to team up to take down one adult. You will receive one hour of "counter-tactics" training.
- There is no protective padding for any combatant other than the standard-issue cup.
* The kids are motivated enough to not get scared, regardless of the bloodshed. Even the very last one will give it his/her best to take you down.

pay attention to that last one.[/quote:70dd3]
Motivated or not, you clock a 5 year old in the face and they'll cry. And they are running at you from random spots. Thats a knockout-fest waiting to happen.

Coleman 04-23-2005 07:57 PM

did you not read it?! It says they won't get scared and won't back away.

SoLiDUS 04-23-2005 08:28 PM

I'm 5"11, 190lbs of muscle with a protective CUP. What the FUCK are these
little brats going to do ? LOL... I bet taking 20 would be easy. Count me in.

Hawke 04-23-2005 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coleman
did you not read it?! It says they won't get scared and won't back away.

Then they sure as fuck aren't kids. More like robots. And if they don't back away, how are you supose to knock it out?

Coleman 04-23-2005 09:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hawke
Quote:

Originally Posted by Coleman
did you not read it?! It says they won't get scared and won't back away.

Then they sure as fuck aren't kids. More like robots. And if they don't back away, how are you supose to knock it out?

remember, this was thought when people were drunk. It's not supposed to be realistic lol.

You stop the kids by knocking them out. You knock them out by brute force until their body doesn't function. Think of them more like zombies or something ha.

Nyck 04-23-2005 09:13 PM

Im thinking who gives a fuck......


this is why you shouldnt drink and think......

Cpt. Obvious 04-23-2005 09:57 PM

5 year old kids would be easy, but goats thats another story.

Hawke 04-24-2005 12:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoLiDUS
I'm 5"11, 190lbs of muscle with a protective CUP. What the FUCK are these
little brats going to do ? LOL... I bet taking 20 would be easy. Count me in.

I'm 6'1, 160lbs and 14. oOo:

CoMaToSe 04-24-2005 02:20 AM

[quote:f7a81]other than they are all healthy Americans.[/quote:f7a81]
gimme a baseball bat and my fencing foil, and keep 'em coming biggrin:

Jin-Roh 04-24-2005 02:24 AM

5 year olds? oOo:


For as long as I can... 50+ ? oOo: eek:

Chronic Diarrhea 04-24-2005 08:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hawke
Quote:

Originally Posted by SoLiDUS
I'm 5"11, 190lbs of muscle with a protective CUP. What the FUCK are these
little brats going to do ? LOL... I bet taking 20 would be easy. Count me in.

I'm 6'1, 160lbs and 14. oOo:

GG you should play football. Working out everyday will bump you up to 200 easy. I was 185 when I played and I'm only 5'9".

But yeah, I read the guidelines, but it really doesn't matter if the kids aren't going to get scared. 5 year old kids do not have the pain threshold to withstand a grown man's knee/leg/fist to the face. The velocity of the impact would be more than enough to knock them down for a while, giving you time to knock most of them down at the same time. Since there would be less kids running at you, you could easily start concentrating more damage on each one, and eventually all those kids would be knocked out.


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