Ahh let em do it.

We refer to my school as the 4th Reich.

I just got up and walked out of my class. My teacher would ask where i was going and i would ignore him. He gave up after a while. Its not like i missed anything, i still passed with a B for fucks sake. Econ was such a breeze.

Its great i would show up 20 minutes late, and 40 minutes into class i would walk out be gone for 5 minutes (im a quick shitter) come back sit down all without saying a word. The teachers may get mad at first but just ignore them, and they catch the point that you dont give a fuck sooner or later.

Oh and as for the military respecting your shit time. They do not. You get 10 minutes to have your whole fucking platoon shit, pissed, and back into formation. Then you get those ass holes who take 3 years to pinch it off, and all that time you had is down to nill. One thing you'll learn people will always do for themselves first, even in the army.

anyone have any techniques on how to have a perfect shit everytime? (i.e. no need to whipe) "clear exit"

<PfcGreen> pssst pyros on crack
<Innoxx> pyro's been tossing too much salad
<PfcGreen> lol
<PfcGreen> Butters is a FUCKING MORON!

all these statements seem correct.

eat while ur taking a shit..... hey direct deposit aint it biggrin:

have you ever talked on the phone, ate AND taken a shit before?

[quote="Old Reliable":548b7]anyone have any techniques on how to have a perfect shit everytime? (i.e. no need to whipe) "clear exit"[/quote:548b7]

the least amount of cleaning is when u take the wet shit. they are liquid, they squirt out and they dont stick much.

So, you do like eating ass.

I tough it out everytime I have to take a shit in school. So far Out of 12 years of school I only shit once in 7th grade, and that wasnt bad seeing how my elemnetary school was very clean. But I am not touching my high school toilets with a 25 foot pole.

I haven’t EVER been in the school toilets... EVER! And if i ever have to go back to visit my school for a fucking reunion or something, i still aint gonna go in.

Well, i piss all the time in my school (in the urinals) happy:

Yes but Vance, at my school there is shit smeared on the urinals...

The urinal cakes are stained brown...

Is Nothing Sacred ??

oOo:

why do they call them urinal cakes if you can't eat them?

Ya know, I don't EVER recall having to take a shit at school! Not ONCE! Wow, that blows my friggin' mind.

I remember in residence at university, you'd NEVER announce that you were gonna go take a shit. The boys would "bag you on the shitter"...meaning, they'd fill grocery bags with freezing cold water and toss 'em over the stall.

Ever tried wiping yer ass with sogging wet toilet paper? It just doesn't work.


Zone

Fuck, all your schools revolve around bullying other students! That sucks.

I can see why Anti had an Anxiety attack. hake:

Dude school bathrooms smell like weed and cigaretes.

is their something wrong with that?^ evil:

all the bathrooms I am acquainted with smell like urinal cakes, strawberry flavor

Well, you lucky bastard! I'd walk out too, but knowing my SMALL school, they'd chase me and drag my ass back to my seat...

That's prob. basic training, am I correct?? Other then that, I was told by many ex-military (including my Father) that they respect personal times (writing letters, taking a shit, waxin' the carrot LOL).

dman hate it when people wipe thier ass using their fingers and then draw on the wall.

[quote:77844]dman hate it when people wipe thier ass using their fingers and then draw on the wall. [/quote:77844]

Yeeeeeeah.....That is soooo annoying.... eek:

Do you have a list of pet peeves as weird as that?

iv never heard of anyone doing that before eek:

Does anyone find it odd that a subject on shit/doody has blown up to this popular? LOL happy:

[quote="aNti hEro":c9c5b]heres a school story for u

during the month before december (i have no idea what it is) my teachers went on strike for 4 weeks. u know what this means to me? being locked away in my room, pure isolation. couldnt be any better. so im enjoying it, playing mohaa till 5 in the morning, sleeping in till 5 pm. life couldnt be any better. then i find out we have school in a week. im like fucccccccck. so i wake up for school on the monday, and im really pissed but not too pissed. so my mom drives me to school cause im lazy, and shes a sucker. i get dropped off and as soon as i walk into the school doors, i start panting. seeing everyone was a shock, and i fucking hated all of them. i kept panting harder and harder.. then i went o my locker and stood there. by then i was breathing very heavely, and i knew something wasnt right. a friend came up to me and got me to sit down. i started breathing as hard as i could, it felt lik enothing was coming in. my face, hands, legs, and everything started to go numb. i remember trying to find my best friend, and he was in the main foye (sp) where everyone was. i walked to him, with tears in my eyes, my face pure white, and stumbling everywhere. everyone started making comments like crybaby... and i wanted to fucking die, and take them along with me. my best friend helped carrie me with my arm around his shoulder to a bench in a hall where he got me some water. after a bit of sitting down, the tears went away and the heavy breathing stopped. i regained feeling of my body, and i felt kinda undercontrol, but i was still pissed off. people told me go home kyle just go, but i didtn want my parents to know. so i went to my frist class art.. where no one would bother me. all i did was sit there and try not to burst out crying and throw a fit.

that sotry has nothing to do with shit, but its the shit that i take at school. kids still call me crybaby sometimes..[/quote:c9c5b]

The month before december would be november..... eek:

BTW you hyperventilated, that happened me in a park once and i had to get a taxi down to the hospital, felt like i was gonna choke or something then when i got into the hospital i took those symptoms, numb hands and body etc. Had to start breathing in and out of a bag for a few minutes before it went away.

It basically happens because yo're breathing too much air in and not expelling any carbon dioxide out. To stop it you just have to slow your breathing down, easier said than done i know. Dunno why people were calling you a cry baby its a fucking freaky experiance you really do think you're gonna drop dead or collapse on the spot. I would grabbed the nearest fucker to me and taken advantage of my numb hands to throttle the bastard.

Still sorta get it from time to time, and becaus of it im "agraphobic" which basically means i can't stray too far from the house for fear of taking another one. Great life aint it cry:

I never avoided having to shit in school, i just never had to, so without meaning to i never took a shit in school.
in primary school aged 5, i needed a piss but the toilets were small so only like 3 kids were allowed in at a time. i was desprate so i went for one against the school wall and agot caught by a little girl class mate who told on me. i got a row infront of class and cried. but i fancied the teacher so it was ok.

my only shitting experience was in boy scouts, 6 of us were at a egional competition, and had our own shit tent. we all made an acgreement not to shit or piss in it so when we emptied it out it was just the normal blue liquid stuff free from shit and piss. the woods behind us was our toilet.
I was collecting wood when i had to go, so i went, and realised i didnt have any TP with me, so i took a large leaf and wiped, and on inspection it was clean. i had done my first ever and only dry, smudge free shit, and it couldnt of been at a more valuable time!

5 year old and fancying the teacher?

hell yeah she was fine. it was primary 2 so i would have been 7, my mistake.
in primary 4 we had a hot teacher and three of us got called to her desk. she sat at her desk, we stood at her desk, and could see right down her top. we were fighting back the laughter, and the teacher wasnt amused because she thought we were laughing at her. you had to of been there i guess....

Ummm one time in first grade i went to take a piss and i kinda lost control and pissed all over myself. That was embarrassing.

Same year a girl pissed her pants in the seat right next to me. That was sick.

[quote="Sargent_Scrotum":71328]iv never heard of anyone doing that before eek:[/quote:71328]
I saw someone do it.