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-   -   Official JOKES THREAD! (alliedassault.us/showthread.php?t=38544)

Pyro 07-19-2004 11:50 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by maple
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tripper
Quote:
Originally Posted by maple
knock knock
who's there?
penis

MrLevinstein 07-19-2004 11:51 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pyro
Quote:
Originally Posted by maple
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tripper
Quote:
Originally Posted by maple
knock knock
who's there?
penis
penis who

Coleman 07-20-2004 01:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerard
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hawke
Arabs in Star Trek
The Saudi Ambassador to the UN has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where he meets President Bush. They shake hands and as they walk the Saudi says, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America." President Bush says, "Well, your Excellency, anything I can do to help you, I will do." The Saudi whispers "My young son watches (and loves) this show Star Trek and in it there are Russians, and Blacks, and Asians, but never any Arabs. He is very upset. He doesn't understand why there are never any Arabs in Star Trek."

President Bush sorta chuckled and leaning toward the Saudi, whispers back, "It's because it takes place in the future...."

Posted by Simo at vc.net
[img]http://homepage.ntlworld.com/gerald.marley/fg/scale2.jpg[/img]
Call me nuts, but I actually thought that was pretty good

guarnere 07-20-2004 01:15 AM
Rape at knifepoint is hot...I don't care what anyone says.

Bucknub 07-20-2004 01:24 AM
[quote="Garry Coleman":cc1fe]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerard
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hawke
Arabs in Star Trek
The Saudi Ambassador to the UN has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where he meets President Bush. They shake hands and as they walk the Saudi says, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America." President Bush says, "Well, your Excellency, anything I can do to help you, I will do." The Saudi whispers "My young son watches (and loves) this show Star Trek and in it there are Russians, and Blacks, and Asians, but never any Arabs. He is very upset. He doesn't understand why there are never any Arabs in Star Trek."

President Bush sorta chuckled and leaning toward the Saudi, whispers back, "It's because it takes place in the future...."

Posted by Simo at vc.net
[img]http://homepage.ntlworld.com/gerald.marley/fg/scale2.jpg[/img]
Call me nuts, but I actually thought that was pretty good[/quote:cc1fe]

I found it funny aswell to be honest, Gerard is just emo

Akuma 07-20-2004 05:05 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by guarnere
Rape at knifepoint is hot...I don't care what anyone says.
I concur.

Akuma 07-20-2004 05:06 AM
Edit: Double post

Eight Ace 07-20-2004 05:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Akuma
Edit: Double post
...no sweat...it was better than the first one... eek:

Zoner 07-20-2004 07:54 AM
What has 9 arms and sucks?

Def Leppard

Nyck 07-20-2004 09:53 AM
what gets smaller as it moves forward

a leper in a windtunnel

Maplegyver 07-20-2004 09:57 AM
what gets bigger as it engorges with blood.





a desk

KTOG 07-20-2004 10:00 AM
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle?

A dead poodle with an 19 inch asshole.

Apocalypse | NoW 07-20-2004 10:09 AM
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.

They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.

The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."

Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.

The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."

Maplegyver 07-20-2004 10:10 AM
[img]http://www.fathippo.net/images/apoc/Plane.jpg[/img]
ripper

Apocalypse | NoW 07-20-2004 10:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by maple
[img]http://www.fathippo.net/images/apoc/Plane.jpg[/img]
ripper
?


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