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-   -   Going to Hell? (alliedassault.us/showthread.php?t=24338)

Wilko 05-05-2003 06:25 AM

Going to Hell?
 
If so...HAHA!
If not, Congrats!
If you're not sure...do this quiz [url:618b2]http://www.4degreez.com/misc/dante-inferno-test.mv[/url:618b2]

Good luck!

Chronic Diarrhea 05-05-2003 07:06 AM

Level 4. I got into a conversation with someone friday about Heaven and Hell, and I said since Heaven is pure, that means Hell is the opposite. Aren't most unpure things fun? (sex, beer, sex, girls, etc...) So essentially Hell is Heaven and Heaven is Hell.

Chronic Diarrhea 05-05-2003 07:33 AM

Description of the seventh circle of Hell:

Guarded by the Minotaur, who snarls in fury, and encircled within the river Phlegethon, filled with boiling blood, is the Seventh Level of Hell. The violent, the assasins, the tyrants, and the war-mongers lament their pitiless mischiefs in the river, while centaurs armed with bows and arrows shoot those who try to escape their punishment. The stench here is overpowering. This level is also home to the wood of the suicides- stunted and gnarled trees with twisting branches and poisoned fruit. At the time of final judgement, their bodies will hang from their branches. In those branches the Harpies, foul birdlike creatures with human faces, make their nests. Beyond the wood is scorching sand where those who committed violence against God and nature are showered with flakes of fire that rain down against their naked bodies. Blasphemers and sodomites writhe in pain, their tongues more loosed to lamentation, and out of their eyes gushes forth their woe. Usurers, who followed neither nature nor art, also share company in the Seventh Level.

Man that sucks, but this is how Hell really is?

You: Man I can't belive I got here! I believed in God, this sucks!

Satan: You really think this is bad? Hell man sit down and grab a beer.

You: Um, ok. So how is Hell not bad?

Satan: Meh I got tired of running the mean institution around here. I gave that shit up 500 years ago. Hell none of these guys here have suffered, only those who lived before Christ.

You: I thought God essentially controlled Hell as well, I mean he threw you down here right?

Satan: Yeah, for the first few hundred years, but then I kinda gained control over this place. You know I was second most powerful in Heaven, almost as powerful as God, that's how I influence the people.

You: You mean like when I watched porn all those times?

Satan: Exactly. Anyway, once I got control I learned how to make stuff, so I made lots of beer and fine ass girls. Hey you got a present, look in your pants.

You: Holy Shit! I've always dreamed of something like this.

Satan: Hehe that's not all. All women that dwell in Hell are very, very fine pieces of ass.

You: Thank you Satan!

Satan: Call me Dave.

You: what else do I get in Hell?

Dave: Just about everything! Across the street in Heaven, God doesn't like video games, TV, food, lusty girls, sex, or any other fun things. All he likes to do is make his servents worship him all day. (You look across the street and sure enough people are worshiping. Here in Hell everybody is partying.)

You: That's awesome! What else is there in Hell?

Dave: The only bad thing is in Hell you have to buy everything. You see in Heaven everything is self-providing, but here you have to work to get cool shit. Mind you it's fairly easy to get enough money to buy all this stuff, but I put this system in here so it won't be party party party 24/7, although it does get close to that. See that bigass shop over there? That's the shop of everything, has everything you can imagine in it.

You: Cool, so how do I get money?

Dave: Just shit you would do on Earth. (you finish your beer.)

You: Okay dave, I'll see you around!

Dave: Yeah man! (they do the gansta handshake/half hug thing and walk off.)

I'm not really an advocate of Hell, but it's just some thought.

Wilko 05-05-2003 07:39 AM

hehe.
Oh man, imagine if Hell really was like that cool:

Innoxx 05-05-2003 07:49 AM

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!

Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Level | Score
Purgatory | Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo | Very Low
Level 2 | Very High
Level 3 | Low
Level 4 | Moderate
Level 5 | Moderate
Level 6 - The City of Dis | Very High
Level 7 | Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge | Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus | Moderate

Akuma 05-05-2003 02:55 PM

The wretched King Minos has decided your fate. His tale wraps around his body 7 times.
The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes. Your shade has been banished to... the Seventh Level of Hell!

Hmm... I would think I'd be atleast level 8...

Tripper 05-05-2003 03:05 PM

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Fourth Level of Hell!

Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Level | Score
Purgatory | Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo | Very Low
Level 2 | High
Level 3 | Moderate
Level 4 | Very High
Level 5 | High
Level 6 - The City of Dis | Low
Level 7 | High
Level 8- the Malebolge | Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus | Moderate

I got Level fucking 4!

Killa123 05-05-2003 03:12 PM

Level 6th-Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis

Airborne Butters 05-05-2003 03:12 PM

I'm at level 8...that's a bit scary have Satan living in your basment. I need to clean-up my act.

Akuma 05-05-2003 03:14 PM

[quote="Airborne Butters":43893]I'm at level 8...that's a bit scary have Satan living in your basment. I need to clean-up my act.[/quote:43893]

Bullshit!!! How the fuck can good ol' butters get level 8 when I accually worship the devil and sacrifice small animal and only get level 7....

Airborne Butters 05-05-2003 03:20 PM

I don't know, but it's really creeping me out. I'm starting to think about stuff now...

Duke_of_Ray 05-05-2003 05:32 PM

I got to purgatory, the top level on that stupid test I guess. I already knew Heaven was were I was going, but I wasted my time on that test anyways. AS a Christian I have nothing to worry about.

Zoner 05-05-2003 05:34 PM

Every time I try to access the page, I get a "server too busy" error.

Guess I'm an angel. angel:

Milla 05-05-2003 05:49 PM

Milla is level 2 biggrin:

Bazooka_Joe 05-05-2003 05:51 PM

[quote:ca1f9]Server Too Busy

The server is getting slammed by so many people taking the Dante Inferno Test. To prevent the server from crashing, we've taken the test down temporarily. Please excuse this inconvenience.
[/quote:ca1f9]

Dammit!


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