Sherlock Holmes Joke
 

Read this and thought it was pretty funny.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night, Holmes wakes Watson up: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."
Watson says, "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."
Holmes replied: "Watson, you idiot, somebody stole our tent."

This was voted the worlds funniest joke some how.

bah

It was good for a chuckle, but not for the worlds best joke.

The worlds best joke is: How do you stop a Polish tank???














Shoot the guy that's pushing it! biggrin:

Re: Sherlock Holmes Joke
 

Preposterous!!...Mr.Holmes would never take that tone with his colleague Doctor Watson,
...you sir are a blackgaurd and a scoundrel!!

...removes glove...slaps CoUbLaCkAs face.... oOo:

ROFL JOE! spooge will love that one! biggrin:

Re: Sherlock Holmes Joke
 

[quote="Eight Ace":e24ff]Preposterous!!...Mr.Holmes would never take that tone with his colleague Doctor Watson,
...you sir are a blackgaurd and a scoundrel!!

...removes glove...slaps CoUbLaCkAs face.... oOo:[/quote:e24ff]
you better stop smoking whatever your smokin

fuck off coulblacka,you don't have wit and you don't understand 8's humour

and you dont understand mine cause i was joking. Settle down, and who is coulblacka?

And how old are you, like 55? Get a life.

And you guys wonder why every thread gets locked.

What do you do if a polish soldier throws a grenade at you?






Pull the pin and throw it back! biggrin:

[quote="Bazooka_Joe":906fe]It was good for a chuckle, but not for the worlds best joke.

The worlds best joke is: How do you stop a Polish tank???














Shoot the guy that's pushing it! biggrin:[/quote:906fe]

isn't that Iraqi tank?

how do you break up a game of Taliban bingo?



















yell "B-52!"

Heh. Last one was good.

This will probably start an argument and get this thread locked, but I found this to be pretty funny:

President Bill Clinton called Chretien with an emergency: Our largest condom factory has exploded!" the American President cried, "My people's favourite form of birth control! This is a true disaster!"

"Bill, da Canadian pipple would be 'appy to do anyt'ing wit'in der power to 'help you," replied the Prime Minister.

"I do need your help," said Clinton. "Could you possibly send 1,000,000 condoms ASAP to tide us over?"

"Certainment! I get right on it!" said Chretien.

"Oh, and one more small favour, please?" said Clinton.

"Oui?"

"Could the condoms be red, white & blue in colour, at least 10" long and 4" in diameter?" said Clinton.

"No problem," replied the Prime Minister and, with that, Chretien hung up and called the President of Trojan Condoms.

"I need a favour, you got to make 1,000,000 condoms right away and send 'dem to Hamerica."

"Consider it done," said the President of Trojan.

"Great! Now listen, dey hab to be bleu, blanc et rouge in colour; at least 10" long and 4" in diameter."

"Easily done. Anything else?"

"Yah," said the Prime Minister, "an' print 'MADE IN CANADA, SIZE MEDIUM' on each one."

lol nice, what do you call a line of mexicans holding hands in ur yard?
a spic-ket fence!

Got a few complaints about this one, sorry, had to edit. -Joe.

What do a pizza delivery man and a gynocologist have in common?










They see and smell, but can't eat.

...yes, but one can take a secret lick more readily than the other... oOo:

Damn Speirs.... Get the fuck out of here, thats not even close to funny.


Joe can we get some edits and lockage?

I've heard a worse Jewish Holocaust joke than that. I won't post it for fear of getting smacked down by admin. I didn't laugh at the joke either....disgusting really.

But I have a good one.

This man went into the doctor and the doctor asked him "What's bothering ya?" and the man said " Doctor I can't see straight all of a sudden, I see spots in front of my eyes." The doctor look ou a torch and shone it in his eyes. He thought for aminute and said. "You've got CB."
"CB, what the fucks CB? I've heard of TV, VB never heard of CB."
"it stands for Christian Brother."
"What the fuck do you mean by that?"
"it means your pupils are fucked."

Badomm-ching!

/me watches tumbleweed drift past.


eek:

I thought the Irish had a good sense of humour!

Don't you get it??

just think of Catholic priests biggrin:

No.

It';s a joke about sexual absue in the church....I can't believe people don't get it I'll tell one about WWII people will be bound to get this one.

There was this guy who lived in Philadelphia in 1942. He had always been raised by his mother and was a bit unedcucated in certain areas of life. After Pearl Harbour he decided to join the Navy. His mother asked him to write regularly. So off he went to join the NAvy.

After a few months she received the first letter from him. It read

Dear Mummy,

I can't tell you my location because of the censor, but I can tell you that last week I got off the boat and shot a polar bear.
Lots of love.

The second letter she receievd read.

Dear Mummy,
Having a wonderful time. I can't tell you where I am but the other day I got off the boat and danced with a hoola girl.
Lots of love.

The next letter she received read.

Dear Mummy,

Have been at sea for months. Yesterday I visited the ships doctor and he reckons that it would have done me more good if I had shot the hoola girl and danced with the polar bear.

...LOL.

I'm suprised no-one picked up on this rather racist joke. What are you guys thinking when you post such filth?

I'm glad I didn't read the Jewish one, otherwise flaming would commence.

I could post a terrible mean Jewish joke but I won't. My feeling is if you have a joke and it's a bit racist, if you feel you can tell that joke to a table full of people of that race without insulting them, then go ahead.

However his Jewish joke that I heard was absolutely wrong hake: