The best quotes from "The Simpsons"
 

"Duff man says alot of things, oh yeah!"

post your favs biggrin:

Burns: "...and its made from 100% recycled animal!"

Homer: "HOLY MACARONY!!!"

Apu: "Shut up... Why don't you shut up?... I can't believe you won't shut up!"

I don't really have a favorite one... maybe...

Krusty: "Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down!"

"i bent my wookie"

-ralph

"C'mon, Moe. It's been St. Patrick's day for hours now and I'm not drunk yet! "
--Homer Simpson

Lisa: [reads card] ''Come to Homer's BBBQ. The extra B is for BYOBB. Whats that extra B stand for?''

Homer: ''It was a typo.''



Homer: ''Help, somebody light this monkey!''

"mebbe it just collapsed on it's own"
"duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem"
"1 dollar for eternal happiness...mmm...i think ill keep the dollar"

Homer: Default! The two sweetest words in the English dictionary! De-fault! De-fault!

"Dancing away my hunger pains, moving my body so my stomach won't ache, I'm kinda like Jesus but not in a sacreligious way..."-Homer

I don't know if that's the exact words, been a while since I've seen that.

D'oh!

It's the episode where Homer is so happy, he does everything he used to hate. He goes to church, takes the bread and says "mmmm. . .sacrligious. . ."

Oh and when Homer had the bucket on his head, and Bart was drilling eyeholes into the bucket.

HOMER: "Ok, easy. ... easy. . .little more. . .."

*Sound of drill penetrating flesh*

HOMER: ".......Too far."

heh

Principal Skinner: "Quick Nibbles, chew through my ballsack!"


Hardest I EVER laughed at the Simpsons, and that's saying something...


Zone

Homer: "Ahh, somethings clawing at my leg, nevermind it stopped."


Thats when he was rich and on the yaht and the pirates took it over. biggrin:

But I don't even beleive in JEBUS ( HOMER )

dr hibert "you have 24 hours to live ... sorry 22 hours to live sorry to have keep you waiting for so long"

From the sushi episode.

Duff man: that brown patch needs a little h20hhh!
"Duff man cant breath, oh no!"

ralph - "ohhh they taste like....burn-ing"

and " hello, supernintendo chalmers"

Forbidden donut..

or when the family was traveling and grand pa had to use the bathroom....then dr hibert told homer that both his fathers kidneys exploded, and homer says. "So your telling me I dont need a new set of tires?"

Hmmm
 

Grandpa- Kill the Boy!

Marge- How did you know he was a vampire?

Grandpa- A VAMPIRE?!?!?!

Plot: Homer is wearing a civil war costume and hes paying for a heg of beer...

Homer - "Ok apo i need a keg of beer and i six pack to hold me down till i cap the keg"

In the same episode a couple of sceenes later...

Homer - "Hey apo you wanna come to the reenactment of the civil war with me"

Apo - "No i think ill stay here"

Homer - "You sure, were doing a civil war reenactment and we need lots of indians to shoot."

lol that was jokes

ralph - "i choo choo choooose you"
i liked something from the one that was on this sunday but i forgot..

Don't you hate pants?!

hell ya, im naked right now

Marge: No Homer, you'll kill us all!
Homer: Or die trying!

"I sleep in a drawer!"

- Ralph

"Sleeping! That's where I'm a viking!"

- Ralph

"SAVEEEE ME JEBUS!"

- Homer

"I'm not normally a religous man, but Superman, if you're listening..."

- Homer

"Hey, Baby. Welcome to dumpsville, population: You."

- Homer

ROFL. I love that show.

or when they were in new york

homer: ' I'm getting outta this city alive, even if it kills me"

D'OH!

otto: dog is god backwards
homer: and otto is..otto backwards (laughter)
otto: now im scared

^episode when homer starts smoking pot after crows peck out his eyes

"Simpson-Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in his-tor-y. From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree....D'oh!"

haha or the classic one

homer: (in convincing voice)" helloh, my name is mr burns, I belive you have a package for me"

clerk: ok, mr burns, whats ur first name?"

homer: "I - don't - know"

hah classic

Homer - "Safety? But sir! If truth be known, I actually caused more accidents around here than any other employee, including a few doozies no one every found out about."

Homer - "No, no, no, Lisa. If adults don't like their jobs, they don't go on strike. They just go in every day and do it really half-assed"

Homer - "If they think I'm going to stop at that stop sign, they're sadly mistaken!"

homer " see honey, adults have a little thing called money..."

homer: " hey, if you dont like it, move to russia"

hahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaa

Homer : There doesn't seem to be any "any" key! hm... I think i'll have a tab, wait no time the computers starting.


ROFL!

ralph: I glued my head to my shoulder

Ralph: "my cats breath smells like cat food"

Marge: Homer the plant called and said if you don't show up tommorrow, then don't bother showing up on monday
Homer: Whoo Hooo!!! Four day weekend!

Ralph: My cats breath smells like catfood

Principle Skinner: Ralph Wiggins
Ralph: Whoo, hoo, I won, I won.
Principle Skinner: Ralph you didn't win your failing english
Ralph: Me fail English, thats Umpossible?

I could just keep going on an on... simpson rock!

Funniest scene from an episode is from "Gummie Venus DeMilo" when Kent Brockman takes homer confession and edits it to make homer say that he grabbed the babysitters ass. Its hilarioius.

In the episode where Sideshow bob hpynotizes Bart into killing Krusty:

Marge: ''Where have you been young man?''

Bart: [Hypnotically] ''I was at the flow-er shop.''

Homer: ''Uh, yeah, I was at the flower shop too! Yup, gettin' drunk at the ol' flower shop.''

[quote:673f1]and " hello, supernintendo chalmers"[/quote:673f1]

I laughed out loud when I read that... OMG...