New life soon.
 

My child is going to be born soon. This truly is a great time in my life. Does anyone have any advice or anything? It's just amazing what we can do to make new life. I cant wait. Again, any advice anyone?

Dont swear around your kid biggrin:

No more games.

whos the father?

Yea... after I get married I'm done.

[quote:fe9a4]whos the father?[/quote:fe9a4]

rock:

[quote="Sergeant_Scrotum":b433a]whos the father?[/quote:b433a]

its me. i impregnated Rob.

Didn't Yidiss have a kid not to long ago aswell?

[quote="Sergeant_Scrotum":2fa19]whos the father?[/quote:2fa19]

[img]http://reichnation.com/uploads/isthistheseventiessig.jpg[/img]

and he has never been seen since. God rest his soul. THe child ate him cry:

Well, I haven't had a child yet but I have family that have (brothers and sisters) and let me tell you... you are going to have the time of your life. You are no longer going to spend that $50 on a new computer game, rather you are going to spend it on a few packs of diapers. Plus, the first year will be complete hell since you won't get more then 6 hours of sleep a night if you are LUCKY.

P.S Think of how you want your child to be. Like, do you want him/her to be successful but you may have to be strict on certain things to accomplish that? My sister made the mistake of letting her daughter to whatever the hell she felt like when she was little and now she is paying for it. My niece doesn't respect her Mother at AGE 9. Make sure you are firm on certain subjects, but you can still have fun... make sure you explain why you are punishing your child, etc. Not to sound like a fuckin' expert, but i've seen how my brother and sisters raised their children, and they regret how they do things because they get "soft".

Good luck and get ready for a wild ride!

Advise?

I'd say don't let the lil' bugger sleep in your bed. Let him/her get used to sleeping in their own crib. Also, don't always hold the kid, they get spoiled real fast and then won't let you put them down. Take a ton of pictures because they literally change overnight and they are only small for a short time in their lives.
Good luck to you.

dont have anymore, dont admit you have one, and get the fuck outta there.

Dont let him drink poisin, unless he's become a nuisance.

Introduce him to drugs and poo on him.

don't allow them to play Mature rated games.

OK, let me get this right. It's OK to ask about childhood advise on these forums but asking about dating, Gf's, hairstyles, etc classifies one as a loser with no life by most, correct?

get married and stay that way, children from broken homes are the worst

[quote="Sgt>Stackem":5ba7c]get married and stay that way, children from broken homes are the worst[/quote:5ba7c]

Bullshit. Children who get what they want all the time are the worst. My parents were divorced ages ago, and i'm fine. I find that rich kids are the worst, but anyways, yeah
Be firm with the child, don't let him/her be in charge, or you will become their bitch.

They can smell fear.....one minute they are a cute little baby, then they are choking you with an extension cord.

always show love for your child and avoid conflict as much as possible....present the child with endless opportunities to explore life and expand the knowledge..

Correct.
We dont care about you, your horny need, your "weave". This kid could be the one who finds the cure for cancer.

Yes but if you date a girl and marry her and then have sex with her you could create the kid that cures cancer happy:

Like W C Fields said "There are no [url=http://www.ianai.net/jokes/GroceryStoreKid.avi:be4b5]tough[/url:be4b5] kids.........Just parboil them for three hours or so and they turn out tender every time."

[quote="Animal Mother":05178]Correct.
We dont care about you, your horny need, your "weave". This kid could be the one who finds the cure for cancer.[/quote:05178] Who the hell said anything about weave, huh? annoy:

kiss your social life, sexlife, gaming life, and any other life you have goodbye. say good bye to sleep as well. you will run on adrenaline the first few weeks then you and the mommy will start to go at each others throat eek: ..advice?

...eat in shifts. assuming you work 40+ hours a week..take the kid as much as you can when you get home and always take the kid on the weekends. if they cry go through a checklist:

-check diaper
-hungry?
-might be hot or cold
-over stimulated in which case you will just have to deal with it
-over tired(see above)

swaddling the kid for the first 3-4 weeks is golden. might wanna pick up "sounds of the womb" and play it when they get cranky. get a swing.

after about 4 weeks have someone you trust babysit and go bang your girl out for 3 hours straight...gl and hf...gg stupid: