Dumb joke time
 

[quote:ed593]Did you hear about the dyslexic bank robber?

He ran in and shouted "Hit the floor motherstickers, this is a fuck up!"[/quote:ed593]


eek: biggrin: oOo:

What has nine arms and sucks?


Def Leppard.

Re: Dumb joke time
 

[/quote:e9db2]
[img]http://www.ezshots.com/members/gokuguru18/images/gokuguru18-5.jpg[/img]

Plz Plz. Dont make fun of me.............frwiend..

[quote:23fb1]Gabriel came to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you, I have Black folks up here in Heaven who are causing some problems.

They're swinging on the Pearly Gates, my horn is missing, barbecue sauce is all over their robes. Ham hocks, spareribs, pig feet, and chicken bones are all over the streets of gold.

Some folks are walking around with one wing. They have been late taking their turn in keeping the stairway to Heaven clean. There are watermelon seeds all over the clouds. Some of them aren't even wearing their halos, saying it's messing up their hair.

The Lord said, "I made them special, as I did you, my angel. Heaven is home to all my children. If you really want to know about problems, let's call the devil.

The devil answered the phone and said, "Hello Lord, what can I do for you?"

"Tell me what kind of problems you are having down there." The devil said "Wait one minute", and put the Lord on hold.


After 5 minutes he returned to the phone and said "Okay, I'm back. What was the question again?"

"What kind of problems are you having down there?" The Lord repeated.

The devil said, "Man, I don't belie......hold on, Lord". This time the devil was gone for 15 minutes.

The devil returned and said, "I'm sorry, Lord, I can't talk right now. These Negroes dun put the fire out and are trying to install air conditioning.!"[/quote:23fb1]

nd to m

biggrin: biggrin: biggrin:

2 nuns, a rabbi, a talking horse, a fly, and a gorilla all walk into a bar. They all sit down, hang their heads, and order a round. The bartender turns around, sees them, and yells "What is this, some sort of joke?!"

Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls?


You can't unload the one truck with a pitchfork. evil:

How big is Judas' dick?

Big enough!

"OMFG,ROFL."

Theres this guy who lives in ohio. One day he hears a voice in his head. The voice says "Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas".
He ignores the voice
Later in the day he hears the voice again. "Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas".
Again he ignores the voice.
Soon he heres the voice every minute of the day. "Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas".
He can't take it anymore. He believes the voice. He quits his job, sells his house, takes all his money and flies to Las Vegas. As soon as he steps off the plane the voice says "Go to Caesars Palace".
He goes to caesars palace
The voice says "make your way to the roulette table."
The voice says "put all your money on red 23"
He puts all his money on red 23
The dealer spins the wheel, it comes up black 17.
The voice says, "Fuck!"

Why did Hitler kill himself? He got the gas bill.

A man escapes from prision where he has been held for 15 years.
still in his uniform he breaks into a house to find clothing, food, weapons, etc. not to his surprise he walks in on a couple sleeping in bed. he ties the man up to the chair and as he is tying the woman up to the bed he gets on top of her and looks to be kissing her on the neck. he gets up goes to the bathroom and when he is in the bathroom the man says to his wife, "I saw the way he kissed your neck, this man is dangerous, he has been locked up for some time now, look at his clothing! if he wants sex, give in otherwise he might kill us both! I love you honey, stay strong" to which the woman replies "he wasnt kissing my neck, he was whispering in my ear he said he thinks your cute and asked where we kept the vasoline. stay strong honey i love you too"

eek:

A young woman went to the doctor because
she had an extremely large labia and wanted him
to fix it. She was quite embarassed and didnt want
anyone to know why she was in the hospital to have surgery.
When she woke up after surgery there were three roses on
her bed. She was extremely pissed because she thought the doctor
had told her friends/family. Later the doctor made his rounds and she let him have it. The doctor said "wait aminute, i didn't tell anyone about you having surgery". The woman replied and wanted to know who the roses were from.
The doctor replied " the first two roses are from my nurse and I. We felt bad since you were in the hospital all by yourself." The woman replied"well who is the third rose from?" The doctor replied" The third rose is from a guy in the burn unit. He wanted to thank you for his new ears!"

hog man that good