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TRªPT™ is Offline
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Posts: 187
Join Date: Dec 2002
   
Default 12-20-2002, 08:33 PM

-Why is the sky blue?

-How big is the sun?

-Should vegitarians eat animal crackers?

-If a funeral is at night, do you drive with your lights off?

-If a turtle doesnt have a shell, is it homeless or naked?

-If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

-When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

-When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

-Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

-If you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant...what do you do?

-Who do you suppose was the first person to think "That cow over there has
those thing'ies hanging down. Think I'll pull on 'em and drink whatever
comes out"

-When a male police officer becomes a detective, he is commonly refered to
as "Dick Tracy" So, if a female police officer becomes a detective,
does that make her a "Dickless Tracy?"

-When a monkey farts, does it smell like bananas?

-Who do you suppose was the first person to look at a chicken and say "I'm
gonna eat the next thing that comes out that chickens a$$.."

-Why do they call it a building if its already built?

-Where does the white go when snow melts?

-Do blind people have dreams? if they do, do they know what they are seeing?

-If your eyes are round, why can you see out of the corners of them???

-Why is more than one goose called geese but more than one moose is not meese?

-If Snickers really satisfies, why do they make a king size bar?

-Does a one legged duck swim in circles?

-Why do black tires produce white smoke ?

-You have AA, AAA, C, D, 9Volt, Litheum and all those types of batteries. What happened to the 'B' battery?

-If quitters never win and winners never quit. what smart guy came up with the saying "Quit while you are ahead"?

-What happens when you get scared half to death twice?

-What color does a smurf turn when you choke it?

-Scientists say the universe is expanding all the time but what is it expanding in to?

-Why is it when your computer freezes, people keep on pushing more and
more buttons?

-On Christmas Light boxes, why do they say for indoor/outdoor use only? Where
else are we going to use them?

-Why is the meaning of life hard to find when you have a dictionary?

-If you're in a car travelling at the speed of light, what happens if you put on the headlights?

-If 'practice makes perfect' and 'nobodies perfect', why bother practicing?

-I once saw a sign, and it read: "Seeing-Eye Dogs Only". Can dogs read?

-Why do people yell heads up when something is flying towards your
head....do they want you to get hit in the face?

-Why do those signs say, "In Case of Fire, Do Not Use Elevator"? How would you put a fire out with an elevator?

-What is the speed of dark?

-Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?

-Why are soda machines in High Schools, but you cant drink the soda?

-Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

-Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

-Why do they sell a pound cake that only weighs 12 ounces?

-Why do people who only eat natural foods drink decaffeinated coffee?

-Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

-Why don't sheep shrink in the rain?

-Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

-Why is it called a TV set when you only get one?

-Why is a women's prison called a penal colony?

-Why is there an eject button on the VCR remote? Don't you have to get up to get to the tape?

-Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

-Ok, we know skid marks are created by tires.
Tires are created by machines.
Machines are created by man.
Man was created by God.
So.... Who ( or what ) Created God ?

-Why do the buttons on a drive-thru ATM machine have Braille on them?

-How much dirt is there in a hole three feet square?

-If 24 hr. stores are open all the time, why are locks on the doors?

-When someone says to you, "If I don't see you by then, have a nice
Christmas". Does that also mean if they DO see you by then, you
should have a lousy Christmas?

-Did Adam and Eve have navels?

***THE END***

Feel free to answer randomly...
  
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