Alliedassault - View Single Post - Favourite Monologue from a Film or TV Series?

Slinky2397 · 02-06-2003, 10:35 PM

This is from a Jerry Seinfeld CD:

My favorite is the Olympics. I think I have a problem with that Silver medal. If I were an Olympic athlete, I would rather come in last, than win the Silver, 'cause, you think about it, you know you win the Gold, you feel good, you win the Bronze, at least you got something, but you win that Silver, that's like, congratulations, you..almost won. Of all the losers, you came in 1st in that group, you're the #1 loser..No one lost ahead of you. They don't lose by much, you know, these short races, 3 hundreths of a second, 2 hundreths of a second, and I don't know how they live with this for the rest of their lives, you gotta tell the story "Congratulations, Silver medal. Did you trip? Do you not hear the gun go off? Tell us what happened" I trained, I worked out, I exercised my entire life, I never had a date, I never had a drink, never had a beer, I was doing pushups since I was a fetus, I flew halfway around the world, everyone I knew my whole life was there. Some of the events in the olympics make any sense, I don't understand their connection to any reality, like in the Winter Olympics, they have that Biathilon, the one that combines Cross-Country Skiing with a gun, how many Alpine snipers are into this? Why not mix swimming and strangling a guy? Just put a guy at the end of the lane...

I did type all that. Some pretty funny stuff on that CD.

	(#10)
Slinky2397 is Offline Senior Member Posts: 2,586 Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Germany, screaming profanities at the Krauts	02-06-2003, 10:35 PM This is from a Jerry Seinfeld CD: My favorite is the Olympics. I think I have a problem with that Silver medal. If I were an Olympic athlete, I would rather come in last, than win the Silver, 'cause, you think about it, you know you win the Gold, you feel good, you win the Bronze, at least you got something, but you win that Silver, that's like, congratulations, you..almost won. Of all the losers, you came in 1st in that group, you're the #1 loser..No one lost ahead of you. They don't lose by much, you know, these short races, 3 hundreths of a second, 2 hundreths of a second, and I don't know how they live with this for the rest of their lives, you gotta tell the story "Congratulations, Silver medal. Did you trip? Do you not hear the gun go off? Tell us what happened" I trained, I worked out, I exercised my entire life, I never had a date, I never had a drink, never had a beer, I was doing pushups since I was a fetus, I flew halfway around the world, everyone I knew my whole life was there. Some of the events in the olympics make any sense, I don't understand their connection to any reality, like in the Winter Olympics, they have that Biathilon, the one that combines Cross-Country Skiing with a gun, how many Alpine snipers are into this? Why not mix swimming and strangling a guy? Just put a guy at the end of the lane... I did type all that. Some pretty funny stuff on that CD.