[Whatada]

"I had gay burglars last night. The broke into my house and re-arranged all thew furniture." -Robin Williams

"New York is a great city. Except I was at the library yesterday. I asked the librarian for a card, but she said I had to prove I was a citizen of the city, so I stabbed her." -Emo Phillips

"If your parents don't have children, chances are you won't either." -Emo Phillips