loll

Himmler · **loll -** 02-01-2005, 03:01 PM

just got this in an email...

> Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while
they were
> walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the
deep
> end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna
promptly jumped
> in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
>
> When the director of Nursing became aware of Edna's heroic act, she
> considered her to be mentally stable.
>
> When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news
and bad
> news. The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able
to
> rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of
another
> patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad
> news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in his bathroom
with
> the belt to his robe right after you saved him.
>
> I am sorry he's dead." Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put
him there
> to dry. How soon can I go home?"

Nyck · 02-01-2005, 03:38 PM

mr.miyagi · 02-01-2005, 03:41 PM

A paedophile and a 9 yr old boy are walking through the woods on a spooky night.

The boy says to the paedophile: "Mister... I'm scared!"

The paedophile replies: "You think you're scared, I gotta walk outta here by myself!"

mr.miyagi · 02-01-2005, 03:48 PM

oOo:

Bob and his wife are expecting a baby. It's been 9 months and the baby is due at any time. One day, Bob gets a call at work, and a voice on the line says, "come down right away, your wife is going into labor!"

After half an hour of traffic and frantic driving, Bob finally makes it to the hospital. He runs inside, and searches high and low for his wife, with no success. Finally he stumbles upon the nursery, and he sees a young nurse. She's holding a bundle of cloth, and from it a tiny little head pokes out. "Sir," says the nurse, "this is your baby." Bob is astonished, and a wave of joy rushes over him.

The nurse drops the baby on the floor.

Bob goes apeshit. "WHAT THE FUCK are you DOING!" he shouts.

Then the nurse starts to kick the baby around on the floor like a soccer ball. After she's done with that, she picks the baby up and throws it against the wall. "Stop it! STOP! You're killing my baby!" says Bob. The nurse turns and smiles.

"April Fools! It was dead when you got here!"

Duke_of_Ray · 02-01-2005, 04:18 PM

oOo: oOo: oOo:

imported_Grim_Reaper · 02-01-2005, 04:26 PM

dead baby jokes own

Nyck · 02-01-2005, 05:04 PM

whats the difference between pizza and a jew?

Pizza doesnt scream in the oven

oOo:

[DAS REICH] Blitz · 02-01-2005, 05:05 PM

Edna Krabapple

Himmler · 02-01-2005, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nyck

whats the difference between pizza and a jew?

Pizza doesnt scream in the oven

oOo:

old oOo:

Arch · 02-01-2005, 07:01 PM

lol at the baby and other jokes. The jew one.... annoy: , but still funneh happy:

Eight Ace · 02-01-2005, 07:21 PM

A man walks into a bar with a big frog sitting on his head,
so the bartender asks "How'd you get that thing there?"
To which the frog replied..."That's none of your fucking
business you nosey cunt!", and proceeded to stab and bash
the bartender, who was taken off life support two days later. happy:

Himmler · 02-01-2005, 08:04 PM

[quote="Eight Ace":7a432]A man walks into a bar with a big frog sitting on his head,
so the bartender asks "How'd you get that thing there?"
To which the frog replied..."That's none of your fucking
business you nosey cunt!", and proceeded to stab and bash
the bartender, who was taken off life support two days later. happy:[/quote:7a432]

i dont get the funneh?

Eight Ace · 02-01-2005, 08:07 PM

[quote=Himmler]

Quote:

Originally Posted by "Eight Ace":cd4ba

A man walks into a bar with a big frog sitting on his head,
so the bartender asks "How'd you get that thing there?"
To which the frog replied..."That's none of your fucking
business you nosey cunt!", and proceeded to stab and bash
the bartender, who was taken off life support two days later. happy:

i dont get the funneh?[/quote:cd4ba]
...there had to be funneh?

ps:Who'd like a link to a beautiful naked babe telling a joke? cool:

Arch · 02-01-2005, 08:10 PM

[quote="Eight Ace":7c72f][quote=Himmler]

Quote:

Originally Posted by "Eight Ace":7c72f

A man walks into a bar with a big frog sitting on his head,
so the bartender asks "How'd you get that thing there?"
To which the frog replied..."That's none of your fucking
business you nosey cunt!", and proceeded to stab and bash
the bartender, who was taken off life support two days later. happy:

i dont get the funneh?[/quote:7c72f]
...there had to be funneh?[/quote:7c72f]

no, but buttsechs for you beer:

Himmler · 02-01-2005, 08:25 PM

[quote="Eight Ace":8bfcc][quote=Himmler]

Quote:

Originally Posted by "Eight Ace":8bfcc

A man walks into a bar with a big frog sitting on his head,
so the bartender asks "How'd you get that thing there?"
To which the frog replied..."That's none of your fucking
business you nosey cunt!", and proceeded to stab and bash
the bartender, who was taken off life support two days later. happy:

i dont get the funneh?[/quote:8bfcc]
...there had to be funneh?

ps:Who'd like a link to a beautiful naked babe telling a joke? cool:[/quote:8bfcc]

oooo pick me pick me pick me