[ED]

[quote:dc403]Ladies and gentleman welcome to ALLIED ASSAULT WRESTLING! Tonights matchup proves to be a blistering contest of Super-Sized egos, pale sun-starved skin, and mental deception. Currently coming to the ring, the chairmen of AA.COM Bazooka “Bam Bam” Joe, “Westie” Gerard, and Zoner “Sig-Mastah” 91! They are accompanied by team towel boy Noctis, “Gentleman” Rudedog, and Canadian Killer Innoxx. Look at these champions of internet sophistication ladies and gentleman. Is there any greater assemblage of geekdom then what we have before us – I think not. Oh but our next competitors would have to disagree.

Coming down the aisle, weighing in at 450 pounds wet, TEAM AA.COM! They are lead by the returning owner of AA.COM, “BS” BadScript along with the long forgotten Polaris, master of the Butt-Plug-Assault (a move he learned from Chinese Monks). At their side will be The Mad Man From Down Undah – WOOKIE! And listen to this crowd, they are all over WOOKIE! What a celebrity! The crowd just loves a Video Game Store Clerk. And who doesn’t.

And lets get this match started. Joe and Polaris will start off this match for us. It’s a tie-up, and Polaris had Joe in a front headlock.

Badscript – GO FOR HIS BAZOOKA THUMB POLARIS!

Ouch, Polaris bites down on Joe’s Left-Mouse thumb. That’s going to hinder any zooka whoring in the future for AA.COM’s German-like efficient admin Joe.

Whip into the rope, and cross body block on Polaris, and they are both down on the mat!

Fan – FAGS!!111!

And Polaris has Joe down for the one, two – oh! Count interupted by Zoner. Don’t let that charming façade fool you ladies and gentleman, Zoner can get damn nasty when he wants to!

Polaris turns in the owner, MR. BADSCRIPT. Look at the swagger. He’s been gone from the site for many months, but his return weeks ago was as shocking as it was unwanted. And right now he is stomping a mud-hole in Joe.

Badscript – THINK YOU CAN TAKE MY COMPANY FROM ME NATIONAL GUARDSMAN [expletive deleted]!

What’s this that Badscript is pulling out of his pocket. My god it’s a fork – where the hell did he get that. He’s digging that thing into Joe’s ample sized head! And the blood is coming in buckets folks. If you’ve got small children you might want to put them away cause this match is going to get even more brutal.

[phBB error – signal lost]

And The Mad Irishman is climbing the top rope! Joe and a returning Wingman are brawling on the outside, and Zoner has been laid out by Polaris! Noctis has shown his true colors and led his REVOLUTION members out of the building after the assault on Joe and Zoner! Badsript is laying on the mat, useless as usual, about to receive one helluva wakeup call from Ireland!

[lights go out]

What the hell, ladies and gentleman we’re experiencing technical difficulties here!

[lights go back out]

OMFG!!1111!! – Is that? – IT IS!!!! Dustin0096! Von Meyer!! Sh3ll_Sh0ck! Mad Rebel! Sclass21! And leading them – THE ED! My god just what the hell is going on here! They’ve assaulted everyone in sight!!! What is this madman thinking! My god! This is not happening! Ladies and gentleman come back with us next week when we hope to have some resolution to this SHOCKING TURN OF EVENTS!!!![/quote:dc403]