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 A joke. |
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Sergeant 1st Class
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Location: Joined: 06 May 2003
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A joke. -
01-04-2005, 11:46 PM
Once upon a time a man boarded a plane and took his seat.
As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane.He soon realised she was heading straight toward his seat. As fate would have it she took the seat right next to his.
eager to strike up a conversation, he blurts out, "business trip or pleasure??"
She turned , smiled, and said business, I'm going to the annual NYMPHOMANIACS OF AMERICA convention in chicago."
He swallowed hard. Here was the most georgous woman he had ever met and she was going to a meeting for nynphomaniacs!!
STruggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked , Whats your position at this convention?"
lecurer she responded. "I'M THE LEAD LECTURER, WHERE I USE INFORMATION THAT I HAVE LEARNED FROM MY OWN PERSONAL EXPERIENCES TO DEBUNK SOME OF THE POPULAR MYTHS ABOUT SEXUALITY."
Really he asked and what kind of myths are there?
well she explained, "ONE POPULAR MYTH IS THAT AFRICAN AMERICAN MEN ARE THE MOST WELL-ENDOWED OF ALL MEN WHEN IN FACT IT IS THE NATIVE AMERICAN INDIAN WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO POSSESS THAT TRAIT."
"ANOTHER POPULAR MYTH IS THAT FRENCHMEN ARE THE BEST LOVERS, WHEN ACTUALLY IT IS THE MEN OF JEWISH DESCENT THAT ARE THE BEST."
I have also discovered that the lover with the most stamina is the southern redneck.
Suddenly the woman became unconfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said, "I shouldnt really be discussing this with you. I dont even know your name."
"TONTO," the man said, "TONTO GOLDSTEIN. But my freinds call me BUBBA
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 Re: A joke. |
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Senior Member
Posts: 3,672
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Looking for beans and love.
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Re: A joke. -
01-04-2005, 11:49 PM
[quote="Scorpion -]M15F1T[-":2a106]ONCE UPON A TIME A MAN BOARDED AN AIRPLANE AND TOOK HIS SEAT.
AS HE SETTLED IN, HE GLANCED UP AND SAW THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN BOARDING THE PLANE.
HE SOON REALIZED SHE WAS HEADING STRAIGHT TOWARD HIS SEAT. AS FATE WOULD HAVE IT SHE TOOK THE SEAT RIGHT BESIDE HIS.
EAGER TO STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION, HE BLURTED OUT, "BUSINESS TRIP OR PLEASURE?"
SHE TURNED, SMILED, AND SAID, "BUSINESS. I'M GOING TO THE ANNUAL NYMPHOMANIACS OF AMERICA CONVENTION IN CHICAGO."
HE SWALLOWED HARD. HERE WAS THE MOST GORGEOUS WOMAN HE HAD EVER SEEN SITTING NEXT TO HIM AND SHE WAS GOING TO A MEETING FOR NYMPHOMANIACS!
STRUGGLING TO MAINTAIN HIS COMPOSURE, HE CALMLY ASKED, "WHAT'S YOUR BUSINESS ROLE AT THIS CONVENTION?"
"LECTURER," SHE RESPONDED. "I'M THE LEAD LECTURER, WHERE I USE INFORMATION THAT I HAVE LEARNED FROM MY OWN PERSONAL EXPERIENCES TO DEBUNK SOME OF THE POPULAR MYTHS ABOUT SEXUALITY."
"REALLY?" HE ASKED, "AND WHAT KIND OF MYTHS ARE THERE?"
"WELL," SHE EXPLAINED, "ONE POPULAR MYTH IS THAT AFRICAN AMERICAN MEN ARE THE MOST WELL-ENDOWED OF ALL MEN WHEN IN FACT IT IS THE NATIVE AMERICAN INDIAN WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO POSSESS THAT TRAIT."
"ANOTHER POPULAR MYTH IS THAT FRENCHMEN ARE THE BEST LOVERS, WHEN ACTUALLY IT IS THE MEN OF JEWISH DESCENT THAT ARE THE BEST."
"I HAVE ALSO DISCOVERED THAT THE LOVER WITH ABSOLUTELY THE BEST STAMINA IS THE SOUTHERN REDNECK."
SUDDENLY, THE WOMAN BECAME A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE AND BLUSHED. "I'M SORRY," SHE SAID, "I SHOULDN'T REALLY BE DISCUSSING ALL THIS WITH YOU. I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME."
"TONTO," THE MAN SAID, "TONTO GOLDSTEIN. BUT MY FRIENDS CALL ME BUBBA[/quote:2a106]
oOo:
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1st Lieutenant
Posts: 4,948
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: humping gobots...
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01-04-2005, 11:51 PM
funny, but caps-lock sucks...
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Sergeant 1st Class
Posts: 1,664
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Joined: 06 May 2003
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01-04-2005, 11:54 PM
Yeah sorry bout that was a cut and paste from an email a m8 sent me rolleyes:
I retyped most of it dance:
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Major General
Posts: 12,683
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Calgary
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01-05-2005, 12:37 AM
i get it. hes trying to be a jewish indian redneck. cool:
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General of the Army
Posts: 18,202
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Ireland
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01-05-2005, 05:34 AM
Heard that about 3 years ago. =/
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nyck
But one of her fucking grandkids, pookie, rayray or lil-nub was probably slanging weed or rocks out of the house.
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Colonel
Posts: 8,441
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Goatse
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01-05-2005, 05:42 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ninty9
i get it. hes trying to be a jewish indian redneck. cool:
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your powers of perception blind me. GO! Go now and solve major Unsolved crimes! Tell me who killed Kennedy! Find Jonebenet Ramsey!
[img]http://www.aoqz76.dsl.pipex.com/Web%20Page%20Components/Wallpaper/TV/Comic%20Book%20guy.jpg[/img]
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Senior Member
Posts: 1,968
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Warner Robins, Georgia
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01-05-2005, 08:41 AM
------^ i think i saw that episode where he say that.
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Colonel
Posts: 8,441
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Goatse
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01-05-2005, 09:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WidowMaker555
------^ i think i saw that episode where he say that.
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innit that the one with the pieman? or the hobo who invented ichy and scratchy?
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Senior Member
Posts: 4,003
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
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01-05-2005, 05:24 PM
I never thought the natives had the biggest wangs. must be a myth.
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Chief of Staff General
Posts: 20,691
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Brampton Ontario Canada
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01-05-2005, 05:30 PM
sleeping: I guess it would be funny if the ending wasn't so obvious
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General of the Army
Posts: 17,299
Join Date: May 2002
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01-05-2005, 05:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pyro
sleeping: I guess it would be funny if the ending wasn't so obvious
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what did nicole simpson get incarnated as when OJ killed her.
A PEZ DISPENSER!!!!
lololz
what do you tell a woman with a black eye?
nothing you already told the bitch once....OMFG!! haha
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Senior Member
Posts: 688
Join Date: Jun 2004
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01-05-2005, 05:37 PM
i've seen better...dont "thats what she said" that hake:
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General of the Army
Posts: 17,299
Join Date: May 2002
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01-05-2005, 05:37 PM
[quote="Scorched Earth":f2e32]i've seen better...dont "thats what she said" that hake:[/quote:f2e32]
Thats what he said
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General of the Army
Posts: 18,844
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: AA.com North Building, Offtopic Floor, Apartment 1337
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01-05-2005, 05:38 PM
404 Funneh has been initiated but not fully executed.
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