Offtopic Any topics not related to the games we cover. Doesn't mean this is a Spam-fest. Profanity is allowed, enter at your own risk. |
 Dumb joke time |
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General of the Army
Posts: 18,202
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Ireland
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Dumb joke time -
09-11-2003, 09:51 AM
[quote:ed593]Did you hear about the dyslexic bank robber?
He ran in and shouted "Hit the floor motherstickers, this is a fuck up!"[/quote:ed593]
eek: biggrin: oOo:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nyck
But one of her fucking grandkids, pookie, rayray or lil-nub was probably slanging weed or rocks out of the house.
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Administrator
Posts: 17,739
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Camp Crystal Lake
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09-11-2003, 09:54 AM
What has nine arms and sucks?
Def Leppard.
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 Re: Dumb joke time |
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1st Lieutenant
Posts: 4,235
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Austell, Ga
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Re: Dumb joke time -
09-11-2003, 09:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerard
[quote:e9db2]Did you hear about the dyslexic bank robber?
He ran in and shouted "Hit the floor motherstickers, this is a fuck up!"
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[/quote:e9db2]
[img]http://www.ezshots.com/members/gokuguru18/images/gokuguru18-5.jpg[/img]
Plz Plz. Dont make fun of me.............frwiend..
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Senior Member
Posts: 598
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Cave #23, Afghanistan
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09-11-2003, 10:56 AM
[quote:23fb1]Gabriel came to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you, I have Black folks up here in Heaven who are causing some problems.
They're swinging on the Pearly Gates, my horn is missing, barbecue sauce is all over their robes. Ham hocks, spareribs, pig feet, and chicken bones are all over the streets of gold.
Some folks are walking around with one wing. They have been late taking their turn in keeping the stairway to Heaven clean. There are watermelon seeds all over the clouds. Some of them aren't even wearing their halos, saying it's messing up their hair.
The Lord said, "I made them special, as I did you, my angel. Heaven is home to all my children. If you really want to know about problems, let's call the devil.
The devil answered the phone and said, "Hello Lord, what can I do for you?"
"Tell me what kind of problems you are having down there." The devil said "Wait one minute", and put the Lord on hold.
After 5 minutes he returned to the phone and said "Okay, I'm back. What was the question again?"
"What kind of problems are you having down there?" The Lord repeated.
The devil said, "Man, I don't belie......hold on, Lord". This time the devil was gone for 15 minutes.
The devil returned and said, "I'm sorry, Lord, I can't talk right now. These Negroes dun put the fire out and are trying to install air conditioning.!"[/quote:23fb1]
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Senior Member
Posts: 865
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Reading Nick Hornby's about a boy
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09-11-2003, 11:16 AM
nd to m
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Senior Member
Posts: 8,792
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Hans-AlbinVonReitzenstein
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09-11-2003, 11:42 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ed
The devil returned and said, "I'm sorry, Lord, I can't talk right now. These Negroes dun put the fire out and are trying to install air conditioning.!"
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biggrin: biggrin: biggrin:
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Senior Member
Posts: 12,585
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Staten Island, NY, USA
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09-11-2003, 11:49 AM
2 nuns, a rabbi, a talking horse, a fly, and a gorilla all walk into a bar. They all sit down, hang their heads, and order a round. The bartender turns around, sees them, and yells "What is this, some sort of joke?!"
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Captain
Posts: 5,824
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Robertplantsville
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09-11-2003, 12:41 PM
Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls?
You can't unload the one truck with a pitchfork. evil:
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General of the Army
Posts: 18,895
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
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09-11-2003, 02:33 PM
How big is Judas' dick?
Big enough!
"OMFG,ROFL."
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Sergeant 1st Class
Posts: 1,693
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Touchdown City- Morgantown, West Virginia
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09-11-2003, 03:00 PM
Theres this guy who lives in ohio. One day he hears a voice in his head. The voice says "Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas".
He ignores the voice
Later in the day he hears the voice again. "Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas".
Again he ignores the voice.
Soon he heres the voice every minute of the day. "Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas".
He can't take it anymore. He believes the voice. He quits his job, sells his house, takes all his money and flies to Las Vegas. As soon as he steps off the plane the voice says "Go to Caesars Palace".
He goes to caesars palace
The voice says "make your way to the roulette table."
The voice says "put all your money on red 23"
He puts all his money on red 23
The dealer spins the wheel, it comes up black 17.
The voice says, "Fuck!"
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Senior Member
Posts: 4,003
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
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09-11-2003, 03:31 PM
Why did Hitler kill himself? He got the gas bill.
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Senior Member
Posts: 1,565
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: "I have never let my schooling interfere with my education"
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09-11-2003, 03:52 PM
A man escapes from prision where he has been held for 15 years.
still in his uniform he breaks into a house to find clothing, food, weapons, etc. not to his surprise he walks in on a couple sleeping in bed. he ties the man up to the chair and as he is tying the woman up to the bed he gets on top of her and looks to be kissing her on the neck. he gets up goes to the bathroom and when he is in the bathroom the man says to his wife, "I saw the way he kissed your neck, this man is dangerous, he has been locked up for some time now, look at his clothing! if he wants sex, give in otherwise he might kill us both! I love you honey, stay strong" to which the woman replies "he wasnt kissing my neck, he was whispering in my ear he said he thinks your cute and asked where we kept the vasoline. stay strong honey i love you too"
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Major
Posts: 6,413
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: University of Guelph
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09-11-2003, 03:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hayward
nd to m
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eek:
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Corporal
Posts: 899
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Land of opportunity
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09-11-2003, 04:16 PM
A young woman went to the doctor because
she had an extremely large labia and wanted him
to fix it. She was quite embarassed and didnt want
anyone to know why she was in the hospital to have surgery.
When she woke up after surgery there were three roses on
her bed. She was extremely pissed because she thought the doctor
had told her friends/family. Later the doctor made his rounds and she let him have it. The doctor said "wait aminute, i didn't tell anyone about you having surgery". The woman replied and wanted to know who the roses were from.
The doctor replied " the first two roses are from my nurse and I. We felt bad since you were in the hospital all by yourself." The woman replied"well who is the third rose from?" The doctor replied" The third rose is from a guy in the burn unit. He wanted to thank you for his new ears!"
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Senior Member
Posts: 865
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Reading Nick Hornby's about a boy
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09-11-2003, 04:25 PM
hog man that good
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