[Arkan]

Well, taking a dump is really an art. This is how i approach it.

1. I always go to the "quiet" one in the house as not to be disturbed.
2. I always go in with a recent mag like MaximumPC or Readers Digest.
3. I place some toilet paper in the bowl prior to shitting....this minimizes water from spashing on your ass.
4. My daily shits are the same time every day (at night) so i plan accordingly. After a good dump, i follow up with a good wipe and head straight into the shower.
.....and there you have it. The art of shitting Arkan style.