Official JOKES THREAD! - Page 5

Old Reliable · 07-22-2004, 01:39 AM

[quote="Eight Ace":e254a][quote="Old Reliable":e254a]maybe im the only one who doesnt think jokes are funny...setup humour rolleyes:[/quote:e254a]
excuse me but this is the JOKE THREAD, you'll find the tedious wanker thread 2 doors down... rolleyes:[/quote:e254a]

yeah, you're the joke offtopic:

Eight Ace · 07-22-2004, 01:56 AM

[quote="Old Reliable":90f73][quote="Eight Ace":90f73][quote="Old Reliable":90f73]maybe im the only one who doesnt think jokes are funny...setup humour rolleyes:[/quote:90f73]
excuse me but this is the JOKE THREAD, you'll find the tedious wanker thread 2 doors down... rolleyes:[/quote:90f73]

yeah, you're the joke offtopic:[/quote:90f73]
Oh, touché!, what dazzling repartee!...oh, I am mortally wounded now…loney:

Old Reliable · 07-22-2004, 01:58 AM

glad you're impressed biggrin:

Eight Ace · 07-22-2004, 03:53 AM

A teacher has been asked to take a class for sex education and is
determined to be as straight with the kids as possible....one boy
asks him "sir, what does a vagina look like?"
"That depends on if it's a before sex vagina, or an after sex vagina" the teacher replies.
"What's the before sex vagina look like" the boy asks.
"It's looks like a beautiful rosebud, the flower of woman hood"
"Well then what does the after sex vagina look like?"
"...well Timmy, have ya ever seen a bulldog eating porridge..?"

calmdown:

Short Hand · 07-22-2004, 04:07 AM

ok do you 2 hate each other or somethig ? cause i luv you both.

Eight Ace · 07-22-2004, 04:19 AM

[quote="Short Hand":256e7]ok do you 2 hate each other or somethig ? cause i luv you both.[/quote:256e7]
...don't go there girlfriend!!... ed:

Short Hand · 07-22-2004, 04:32 AM

danm your games. you nver answer.

Eight Ace · 07-22-2004, 04:58 AM

[quote="Short Hand":5b2a5]danm your games. you nver answer.[/quote:5b2a5]
...hey, I am not the EA Support Line here.

TonyMontana · 07-22-2004, 07:28 AM

[quote="Eight Ace":3216d][quote="Short Hand":3216d]danm your games. you nver answer.[/quote:3216d]
...hey, I am not the EA Support Line here.[/quote:3216d]

LOL fuck the jokes that line was classic

anyways:

How do you say, "What time is it?" in ebonics?
Gimmie yo mutha fucken watch!

Alias · 07-22-2004, 12:29 PM

edit: on second thought nvm

Sirus · 07-22-2004, 12:33 PM

[quote="Eight Ace":9fd01]A teacher has been asked to take a class for sex education and is
determined to be as straight with the kids as possible....one boy
asks him "sir, what does a vagina look like?"
"That depends on if it's a before sex vagina, or an after sex vagina" the teacher replies.
"What's the before sex vagina look like" the boy asks.
"It's looks like a beautiful rosebud, the flower of woman hood"
"Well then what does the after sex vagina look like?"
"...well Timmy, have ya ever seen a bulldog eating porridge..?"

calmdown:[/quote:9fd01]
lmao rock:

Scorched Earth · 07-23-2004, 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guarnere

Rape at knifepoint is hot...I don't care what anyone says.

i must agree to that

Scorched Earth · 07-23-2004, 12:46 AM

[quote=BucKweEd]

Quote:

Originally Posted by "Garry Coleman":39688

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gerard

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hawke

Arabs in Star Trek
The Saudi Ambassador to the UN has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where he meets President Bush. They shake hands and as they walk the Saudi says, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America." President Bush says, "Well, your Excellency, anything I can do to help you, I will do." The Saudi whispers "My young son watches (and loves) this show Star Trek and in it there are Russians, and Blacks, and Asians, but never any Arabs. He is very upset. He doesn't understand why there are never any Arabs in Star Trek."

President Bush sorta chuckled and leaning toward the Saudi, whispers back, "It's because it takes place in the future...."

Posted by Simo at vc.net

[img]http://homepage.ntlworld.com/gerald.marley/fg/scale2.jpg[/img]

Call me nuts, but I actually thought that was pretty good

I found it funny aswell to be honest, Gerard is just emo[/quote:39688] it was funny

bukdez · 07-23-2004, 08:12 AM

mildly...

anyhow... heres one for the Canuks...

3 guys, one from Calgary, one from Newfoundland and one from Quebec, find a lamp and rub it, out pops a genie who says: "normally I give 3 wishes, but since there is 3 of you, i'll grant one each..." the Newf goes first and says: "oh jasus bye, fill da ocean back up wit cod", the genie snaps his fingers and instantly the ocean is teeming with giant cod...
the Quebecer goes second and says: "i wood like you to put up a 100 foot wall all da way around la belle provance to keep out all da anglos"... the genie snaps his fingers and poof, a 100 foot wall appears around the border of Quebec...
next is the guy from Calgary, he looks at the genie and asks: "how high did you say that wall was?"
"100 feet high" replies the genie
"ok" says the Calgarian, "fill it with water"...

Coleman · 07-28-2004, 12:39 PM

Twelve Inch Pianist

This guy walks into a bar, pulls out a tiny piano and stool, and a tiny little man. The tiny man sits down, and starts to play the piano. This other guy notices it.

“Hey, what's that?”

“A twelve-inch pianist. Ya see, I found this magic lamp, rubbed it, made a wish, I got a twelve inch pianist.”

“Can I try?” The man with the piano agrees and a minute later, a million ducks fill the room.

“Ducks? I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks!”

“Ya think I really wished for a twelve inch pianist?