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Use 1 square of toilet paper per visit
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Chronic Diarrhea is Offline
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Default Use 1 square of toilet paper per visit - 04-23-2007, 12:38 PM

Cheryl Crow is apparently on drugs, as she proposes we only use one square of toilet paper per visit. I might as well just shit into my hand and put it inside my mouth, you know, to consume my own non biodegradable waste.

oOo:

[quote:844c3]Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required. When presenting this idea to my younger brother, who's judgment I trust implicitly, he proposed taking it one step further. I believe his quote was, "how bout just washing the one square out."[/quote:844c3]

[url:844c3]http://the-autopsy.blogspot.com/2007/04/aquanet-moment-sheryl-crow.html[/url:844c3]
  
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Default 04-23-2007, 12:42 PM

1 square? LOL i practically use a quarter of a toilet roll anytime i take a shit...or should that be leave a shit as its not like you're taking it anywhere with you? eek:




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Default 04-23-2007, 12:43 PM

rofl

[quote:f9b61]How about just using your hand? Or a rag you carry around? Remind me to give Sheryl a Jose Canseco forearm bash instead of shaking her hand[/quote:f9b61]

[img]http://msnbcmedia.msn.com/j/msnbc/Components/Photos/050207/050207_canseco_book_hmed1p.hmedium.jpg[/img]


  
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Default 04-23-2007, 12:49 PM

We can all have our own personal ass handkerchief.
  
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Default 04-23-2007, 12:51 PM

I reel off 1-2 FEET of paper with each wipe. Sheryl obviously doesn't have hair on her ass.


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Default 04-23-2007, 12:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zoner
I reel off 1-2 FEET of paper with each wipe. Sheryl obviously doesn't have hair on her ass.
imwithstupid:
  
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Default 04-23-2007, 01:01 PM

That could work if it was like 100 ply tp that you could unfold and use however you normally do.


  
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Default 04-23-2007, 01:12 PM

Yea I bundle that shit up


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Default 04-23-2007, 02:07 PM

3-5 per wipe; 1 square is madness.
  
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Default 04-23-2007, 02:12 PM

i have my shit pushed back in so I dont gotta worry about toilet paper.
  
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Default 04-23-2007, 02:20 PM

Perhaps she should simply be executed to cut down on the demand.
  
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Default 04-23-2007, 02:47 PM

i usually wipe my anus with the phone book


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Default 04-23-2007, 02:48 PM

maybe she was thinking as a girl when they gotta clean their little slits after going #1 (Worst wording of any posts I ever made ha)


  
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Default 04-23-2007, 02:54 PM

I eat paper so I wipe when I shit


"I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do if I caught one. I just *do* things. I'm a wrench in the gears. I *hate* plans."
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Default 04-23-2007, 03:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coleman
maybe she was thinking as a girl when they gotta clean their little slits after going #1 (Worst wording of any posts I ever made ha)
thats what i assumed when i read it, she may be stupid, but she isnt dumb enough to think a man can use a single square for his business.


  
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